BEAUTIFUL IMPERFECTIONS WELCOMES YOU
Life is too short to be unhappy for most of it
My name is Lisa Arroyo, I identify as female, I just turned 22, and I think I’m ready to stop bullying myself. I’ve put a lot of time and energy into making my reflection cry. I used to spend hours seeing all the things society viewed as unappealing and undesirable. I used to say nothing but mean and dreadful things to myself. This became my obsession for years, for years I believed there was something fundamentally wrong with me, I believed I was a mistake. Recently I have come to learn that what I used to believe about myself isn’t true and I have been struggling from mental and emotional disorders.
WHAT IS A MENTAL DISORDER? WHAT IS AN EMOTIONAL DISORDER?
A mental disorder like depression can be characterized by an individual’s inability to understand and process emotions occurring from life events.
An emotional disorder like anxiety can be characterized by an individual’s inability to express and process emotions occurring from life events.
Someone who is depressed more often than not won’t understand why their negative perception on life events continue to occur. In this case the person will often generalize situations and believe that every situation will be as equally terrible as the last. This can lead to serious self doubt and lack of self worth.
Someone who is anxious like myself will usually understand why they perceive an event negatively but will fear of reoccurrence. In this scenario the person will often generalize actions and believe that they will negatively impact every situation leading to failure. This can lead to serious self blame, hatred, and guilt.
Knowing the differences in how you interpret experiences can help you understand misconceptions. It is also important to note that a person can struggle from both a mental disorder and an emotional disorder.
MY DISORDERS
My Five
There are five mental and emotional disorders I strongly believe I struggle from based on extensive research into my own behaviors.
GAD - GENERALIZED ANXIETY DISORDER
That tight feeling in your chest
Anxiety can be characterized by both emotional and physical symptoms. With anxiety the physical symptoms could be your palms may begin to sweat, your heart might start racing, you might experience headaches or shivers, shortness in breath, and tightness in chest. With emotional symptoms you may experience thoughts of deep worry and self doubt, always fearing the worst to come true. The difference between a case of anxiety and an anxiety disorder is that sense of control and the period of time symptoms last. Individuals who suffer from an anxiety disorder have little to no control over their worries. For people untreated with serve anxiety the symptoms don’t subside. With anxiety disorder, symptoms begin to dictate decision making.
PTSD - POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER
The events you try not to remember
Trauma can be defined as any one event or multiple events occurring that is too much for the brain to process at the time of occurrence. Post traumatic stress typically presents after a traumatic event. Post traumatic stress can be described as traumatic thoughts or memories that occur at unwanted and uncontrolled times. Post traumatic stress can occur when an individual is awake and during slumber. Post traumatic stress can present as nightmares or can present as conscious triggers. Individuals suffering from post traumatic stress can be sensitive to sound, sudden and loud sounds can contribute to post traumatic stress.
BDD - BODY DYSMORPHIC DISORDER
The things you can’t stop picking at in the mirror
Body Dysmorphic Disorder can be characterized as the negative connotation and fixation on one or more body parts or characteristics. Someone suffering from BDD will often fixated on one part or multiple parts of their body, desiring for it to change. Individuals will obsess over these body parts or features, constantly comparing themselves to others. People suffering from BDD usually struggle with issues of low self esteem and self doubt. Most individuals will try multiple treatment methods to correct their perceived flaws. People experiencing behaviors associated with BDD will often also experience eating disorders.
BED - BINGE EATING DISORDER
Everything or nothing
Binge Eating Disorder can be characterized as having extreme eating patterns such as either fasting or eating until uncomfortably full followed by feelings of regret, guilt, and disgust. Binge eating disorder is the most common eating disorder in the United States, it is also the newest eating disorder with its last modification occurring in 2013. Individuals suffering from BED will often struggle reaching satisfaction with their weight, individuals will often experience distain from weight gain or will distain from no weight change. People struggling from BED often feel a lost of control over their body changes and will try to regain that control with their food intake. Individuals struggling with BED can reach a high body weight and can also be malnourished. Behaviors associated with BED are often also associated with obsessive compulsive disorder. Poor body image, low self esteem, and self doubt are common symptoms of BED.
OCD - OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER
What you can’t stop doing
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder can be characterized as the persistent need to complete one or multiple tasks with a specific time and quantity restraint. OCD is most commonly known as an individual’s need to complete certain daily tasks to an obsessive amount. Individuals who struggle with anxiety around self image issues may experience OCD behaviors within their daily grooming routine. When people struggling from OCD behaviors don't complete their task they can experience feeling of intense anxiety and lurking doom.
RESOURCES
What is the difference between a psychiatrist and a therapist?
A psychiatrist is similar to a therapist in the way they both help you sort out what’s going on in your head. The major difference is psychiatrists are licensed medical professionals who have the authority to make diagnosis and write prescriptions.
I believe it’s important to know the difference between the two because while going to see a therapist can be helpful I have found it more beneficial to have a sense on what issues you need addressed. While this is not necessary in every case, for me my anxiety makes it hard to talk about any of my problems because I fear that I may say the wrong thing and yield bad repercussions. Past therapists not knowing this trait about me have done nothing but overwhelm me which usually causes me to leave therapy.
My next step is put time into researching psychiatrists in my area, what’s yours?
